URBAN TALES

Names vs. Brands

As I'm sitting in the park with stw, doing a guitar session, two boys stop to listen while we're playing “Let Me Entertain You” by Robbie Williams.

Boy: “I know that song. It's a Radio Hamburg song.”
Me: “It's Robbie Williams.”
Boy: “Can you play other Radio Hamburg songs?”
stw and me: *blank stare*

Delightful Discussion

As two guys are passing by, a few fragments of their discussion reach my ear:

“Yes, but erotism is not the same as pornography”

Go Left

The bus driver seemed to be on the wrong track. At the intersection he did not make efforts to turn left into the road like he was supposed to, but instead he stopped at the bus stop along the main road. A woman who sat in front of the bus said “Hey, you've got to turn left into that street”, and the bus driver went “Oh, really?”. He then steered a hard-left right across the street, effectively blocking all lanes because the traffic-light into the road to the left was currently red.

That guy must have been pretty new in the business.

Photo Okay

At the square in front of the town hall, three asian tourists are shooting photos. One of them stands there while another wants to shoot a photo of him with the town hall in the background. A blonde German woman walking by stops behind the man that is to be photographed and smiles into the camera.

Dude #1 (behind the camera): “Okay, okay.”

But the woman already wants to continue her way.

Dude #1 (a bit louder): “Okay!”
Dude #2 (standing a few steps beside the two others): “Bitte” (German: “Please”)
Dude #1: “Ah, bitte, bitte!”

Now the woman stands right beside the surprised man #3 (who has not really noticed her up to now) and puts her arm around him. The man with the camera now shoots the photo.

Dude #1: “Okay!”

Voll hilfsbereit, Digger

In the subway, three teenagers are sitting at one end of the car. They're talking in youth slang (“Weißt Du, Digger!”) and playing various ringtones on their cellphones. On the other side of the bench are a man and a woman. The woman is laughing quietly to the man because of the guys' stereotype behaviour. When getting up to leave at the station where they have to get off, the man drops some box whose contents – millions of little things – scatter across the floor. The three boys instantly get up and help collecting all of those tiny elements. One of them goes to the door to hold it open when the train wants to leave. He asks “Will you make it?” and the woman says “No”. So, they just get off at the next station.

Bomb Scare Observations

As we wanted to leave town to go home via the central station the other day, we found it to be closed due to a bomb scare. while walking around the closed off area to find a subway station that was still in service, we witness some exhilarating conversations between the cops securing the area and the passers-by. At one place, a group of young men dressed in clothes of a soccer team came walking along. Obviously, there had been a game going on. A policeman saw then and shouted “Hey, how did they play?” The boy answered “Bad, they lost”. At this moment a young woman approached me and asked what was going on. I told her why the station was closed. Meanwhile, the soccer guys started making jokes on the situation. One told the cop “Hey, I got three grenades in my backpack”. The cop smiled. The woman I was talking to heard this and said - without actually addressing him - “Yeah sure, very funny, boy. If a bomb would blow up, you'd surely be the first to run like hell.”

At another place, a female officer was surrounded by people, who obviously all asked her the same question - how they'd get to the other side of the station, since the surroundings of the station were all shut off. She explained the way to everyone, a couple of times because new people approached her, asking her the same question. She was clearly unnerved by telling the exact same thing to everyone. Finally, when yet more people addressed her, she said “Hey, you don't want to ask how to get to the other side, do you?”

Remedy

An unkempt-looking man enters the bus and sits down in the rear. He's coughing very loudly multiple times. Finally the woman sitting next to him take out a box from her bag and offers him a peppermint candy. “You like one? Very good for your throat. It always helps me in these situations”.

Doggy Style

In the subway, a woman around the age of 50 is waiting on the platform with her dog. She is approached by a couple of about the same age, and they start a conversation. Obviously the couple owns the same type of dog. As they're talking, they realize that they're both from the same area in south Germany, the woman with the dog lives in Hamburg now, the couple is on a visit. Inside the train, they're still talking. By now the way they talk sounds as if they've known each other for years. The woman takes a slip of paper from her hand-bag and write her mobile number and address down. She hands another piece of paper to the other woman who does the same. Upon handing her address to the woman with the dog, she says “Come visit us whenever you like”.

Ghetto Style

A small group of people near the harbour, obviously residents with their visitors. The man seems to give an introduction about Hamburg: “And then there's Harburg. Harburg is Hamburg's poor area.”

American Style

As we're waiting in the (rather short) queue at McDonald's inside the central station, we're approached by a couple around 30 years of age.

“Do you speak English?”
“Yeah.”
“Do you know if there's another McDonald's in this area?”
(Short discussion among me and my friend)
“Yes, there's one right outside the station, over at the coach station.”
“Ok, thank you.”

...and so they disappear from the restaurant.

We: “???”

Alla Turca

One day in a supermarket. A Turkish man doing his purchases. Suddenly his cellphone rings - with a Turkish music style ringtone.

Worlds Synced

In the line at the cash desk of a supermarket: Two women approach the queue - first an arabic woman with headscarf and a cart full of goods and a second later a German woman carrying a heavy box with bottles or something similar. The arabic lady waves at the German woman and tell her to go first so she can put down the heavy box.

Cause And Happiness

As I am waiting in line at the supermarket and have already put my goods on the table, I notice a woman behind me with only a pack of cheese and some other small things. I ask her whether she wants to go first, which she first declines, but upon my insisting she goes past me while repeatedly expressing her thankfulness. After she told the cashier goodbye she once again addresses me with a “thanks a lot”. She cashier has noticed all this and when she repeatedly tries to scan a mulish chocolate bar, she says in a playful voice “be brave, come on”. Sometimes it's so easy to spread some happiness.